Insecurities

 

 

Woke up today feeling anything but a confident, secure 34 year old. Sometimes I wake up and my 14 year old head repeats itself over & over again.
"The kool kids dont like you"
"You will never be organised enough to grow your business further"
"I probably shouldn't share these needy thoughts... delete the above delete the above" 
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Doing the work doesnt mean everyday is a unicorn ride over the rainbow. Sometimes you feel like you're on a cow ride through a slaughter house (sorry this jus was the 1st helly thing I could think of)🤨
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I guess the idea is that at 14 I didn't know there was a way to feel better, or that I had the power to. I hadn't learned that thoughts arent facts nor had I proved to myself I was capable of thinking daffodil thoughts & believing in myself. I hadn't at the time, proved that these feelings are a result of my thoughts & that I could literally just be aware of them. And try and change them.
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Today in this moment, right now, I "think" I can't feel better but deep down. I "know" I can...
Faith that this too shall pass. Cos it has before. It does.
I hope that you guys know that not everyone feels bloody amazing all the time. Even the dolphin gymnasium, ab showing humans who get paid to fly into the sunset & eat deliciois colourful food all day.
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Noone is immune to self doubt, uncertainty, insecurities. We all have shit days, shit thoughts, and maybe some do not entertain these thoughts, or perhaps share them. For some they come out in other ways.
Perfectionism is a sure sign of feeling "less than"
Don't think you are crazy just for having bad days if you do.
I'm of the opinion that this is just human. (And not just cos feeling vulnerable is on trend) been feeling it since 1998. And it most certainly wasn't trendy then🤣🙄!

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