fat loss

A Week Of Eating: Week 1 Mini cut

Monday

Breakfast 

2 slices of Medium hovis wholemeal bread

 1 tbsp lemon curd

4 egg whites scrambled & 50g raspberries

Snack 

Grenede bar and soy flat white

Lunch

150g prawns

with 140g cod

pan fried in stock with 100g cauliflower rice

Dinner

130g Quorn chicken style pieces

In half can chopped toms

100g spinach & 100g frozen peas & 50g sweet potato

1 slice garlic bread 

Dessert

Sugar free jelly made with unsweetened almond milk

10g peanut butter on top

                       

Tuesday

Breakfast

30g oats with 75g soy yogurt & 50 frozen raspberries

Lunch

100g quorn chicken pieces with 100g chopped toms

50g peas & 50 spinach with 100g sweet potato

Snack 

Soya flat white

Grenede bar

Dinner

Egg fried rice made with

100g tofu, 130g tuna with jalapenos, sundried tomatos, 100g cauliflower rice and one egg

Dessert 

sugar free jelly made with light coconut milk

Wednesday 

Breakfast

Brekki burrito made with 

1 wholewheat tortilla wrap 

options hot choc with a splash almond milk to make spread, & 10g peanut butter

1 chopped apple and 2 egg whites, rolled into a burrito

Snack 

4 fruitella sweets 

Soya flat white

1 small bag poshcorn

Lunch

100g tofu & 130g tuna salad with 

100g sweet potato and cherry tomatoes

Dinner 

140g cod, with 

50g peas, 200g cauli rice 130g butternut squash stir fried together 

with added pea protein powder

Dessert 

170g 0% greek yogurt

1/2 Tbsp lemon curd

Thursday 

Breakfast 

Overnight oats

30g oats, 100ml unsweetened almond milk 

soaked with 50g frozen berries 10ml lemon curd

lunch 

Lunch at The Balck Penny Holborn

Shared 

butter beans on sourdough with goats cheese & Poached egg and pesto with polenta hash

Snack 

1 fillet salmon 

3 bournon biscuit

soya flat white

Dinner

Tuna with mixed curry (the boyf bought home) and 100g cauliflower rice

Dessert 

grenede bar

Friday 

Breakfast 

 Shesupps protein shake made with unsweetened almond milk & 50g frozen berries

Lunch

out at The Drake and Morgan 

Egg white omelette

with Smoked salmon & spinach a 1 tbsp butter

Dinner

1 salmon fillet & 100g steamed butternut squash mash 

Aaaaaaat aaaaaat

5 Gin & slims, 2 tequila shots, 2 glasses red wine

3 kinder eggs

1 bag popcorn

2 slices hovis bread one with cheese & jam, 1 with melted cheese & ketchup 

Saturday 

Breakfast 

Grenede Bar 

soya flat white

Lunch 

Tuna sald with capers, jalapenoes, cucumber and spoon light phillidelphia

Dinner 

1 fillet seabass, 1 fillet coley fish with homemade butternut squash sauce & courgette pasta

Dessert 

200g Holy Couch Ben & Jerrys

Sunday 

She supps protein smoothie with 50g frozen berries & unsweetened almond milk 

Late lunch/dinner

Homemade fish cakes 

aubergine fries & minted peas

Dessert 

Grenede bar 

Average weekly Macros:

Calories: 1735

Protein: 125

Carbs: 185

Fats: 55

Fibre: 27

This is at the top end of where my cut is meant to fall. I am aiming for anywhere between 1550 & 1750 with 130g protein, 150g carbs, 45g fats. But I never expect to hit my macros, or jump to lower cals really easily. My previous macros averages over the last 2 to 3 months fell at 1950 cals, 220g carbs, 100g protein and 65g fats. So the numbers above of my mini cut week are enough of a variant to make a difference. Don't beat yourself up for the nights out, for the biscuits or the ice cream. Above is where my life happened. I don't drink every week. And I always try to fit in, eating out and balancing. A mini cut did not mean that I only ate clean whole foods, or went really low on calories. This is NOT a diet. This is about body composition rather than "loosing weight" I think us girls are uneducated in this. Most of my clients come to me and this is what thet are confused with. They want to loose weight when in rality they need to just change their body composition.  Ie Grow more muscle, drop some fat and change your fat percentage. There can be two women weighing 140lb. One will be 30% body fat and the other 20%. Same weight yet, the 20% body fat woman will look aesthetically what my clients will be after. Its not a weight loss game. I can do a post on body composition if you would all like. So watch this space :) 

Goals for this week are... 

More protein, less eating out (mainly to save some money lol) Macro goals will be 1650ish cals 130g protein  165g carbs, 50g fats.

Disclaimer: These macros are specific to me and will not work for everyone. This is after years of figuring out my body likes and dislikes and what works for my goals. I am still learning also, so plaese do not think these calories or macros are something to follow for each individual. 

For help with your own personal macros and online coaching please check here xxx

 

Bikini comp prep: The begining

As I write I can't quite believe that I have competed in my first ever bikini comp. Even more than that, I can't believe five months from the day I said I was going to, has been, gone and flown by and I have squatted and donkey kicked and rowed my way to the depths of my 'fitness soul' (side note: A different soul to my normal one) 5 whole months of spot on macros, more egg whites than a meringue factory would know what to do with, more tuna than I feel ethically acceptable and more body selfies than you would find on Kim K's phone (well maybe not) Never in a million years did I think that the 5 months would come and go, that I would survive prosper and live to tell the tale. 

Prepping for a bikini comp was always going to be somewhat of a challenge for me. Not in terms of logistics. I work in a gym so that made training, practically, easier. But in terms of what that meant to me, who I was becoming, what my friends and family thought about it, whether my boyfriend could get his head around it. Would I be ready? Could I push myself that hard? Would I push myself that hard? What if I tried and failed? Would I avoid tryin hard in case I failed? Would I push myself to the limit? Did I need to? Should I? Could I? Will I remain sane, healthy, alert, spiritually open and self aware? Could I do this and somehow hold onto the remnants of real life? Would I survive the mind fuck, the challenge, the prep brain, peak week, all the stuff that everyone talks about so horrendously, that you wonder why on earth anyone in their right mind would attempt such a feet?

You hear people talk, people who have done this before you and they speak of losing themselves, their soul, having comp angst, body dysmorphia, chasing a goal that's not sustainable, getting post show blues, feeling lost when its all done. You hear how they don't go out whilst prepping and they only eat chicken and broccoli and how they do cardio for hours a day, 7 days a week and they drop their calories to 1200 and they kill themselves trying to get lean and when it's over they binge and indulge like the world may end and kill their progress trying to eat all the foods that were so restricted before.

I heard it and I thought... hell no! I read it and I thought, "I am not going to do it this way, not if it means loosing my soul, my self, my "ME"I want to tell the tale with a smile and a memory that would not make me shudder at the mere thought.

So... did I succeed in this fundamental goal? I am 1 full week post comp. Currently, I still have my soul in check. I'm 1 week post comp to the day and the last weeks thoughts have varied, between wanting to do another comp asap, wondering if my body can progress in other ways, shamefully wishing that I could stay comp lean and having a niggling thought that maybe I could, if I was really good, perhaps. Then you find your 31 year old, healthy brain and remember that that body was temporary, as it should be. That comp body, despite it being the body you longed for, for most of your teens, all of your 20s, its a body that is not sustainable all year round. The realisation of this was gradual. I had had time to think about that and come to terms with the fact that the body you thought you could get from a quick cabbage soup diet fix and a few body pump classes, is not a body that is attainable doing the above. Not in the short term, nor for the long term. The ( I will dare say it) painful realisation that those IG bodies are not realistic images of a body that is like that day in day out. Do not get me wrong, some people are born having those bodies. The long, lean, lithe bodies you see in Australian Bikini posts in your IG stream. Some people are paid to have those bodies all year round and some people, pose and find lighting and the correct setting to make them look like they have those bodies all year round. And then... some bodies, like my own, (if I want to live a varied, spontaneous life) will sit with at least 3 or 4% more body fat than comp body. That is a fact. I cannot live in a calorific deficit ALL the time. I don't want to. I want to eat pizza sometimes, and go to a cocktail bar on occasion. I want to have avocado on toast daily and not have to plan my days around 3 hrs in the gym. So I have come to terms with the fact that, no, bikini body bodies are NOT and should not be (for the life I want to live) the 'end goal or a goal in which I can maintain day in day out.

Throughout prep thoughts vary...


"Ooo I can see my abs, I'm hungry, do I have time to do fasted cardio. Shit am I gonna be ready? Will I feel comfy on stage? I like my body now, I don't want to get leaner, do I? Tighter? Firmer? Bloody hell, I need to pose, my friends don't get this... but my boyfriend finally does. How did I become someone who actually likes the gym.. ooo I'm hungry, not gonna do fasted cardio today. Go get a bagel. Eat a goddam bagel"

Competition prep means your brain is in "constant" mode. like you have a constant download circle spinning around and around on your forehead. Your body is of course exhausted. The mind and body like to work against each other pushing and pulling and fighting. Its mentally exhausting. Your brain wants to do one. More. Exercise... and your body is saying "hell no" Your brain wants to do ALL the exercises for butt ALL the time and your body is saying "dont you even dare" Your brain is saying... bikini, posing, lunch, carbs, more carbs, less carbs, refeed, not to refeed, is this pose right, oats, coyo... ooo I want coyo, need protein, shit I forgot to order more protein, coffee, black americano please... and your body is saying...

"Mass...age, frapp...u...cino... egg yolk... please"

And people don't understand. They worry you are getting too muscly or that you might get too skinny. They ask if you are losing yourself in it all, they tell you that perhaps you are fighting a loosing battle, they wonder if it's worth it, what's the point? Why bother? They question if you are obsessed, crazy, boring, now that your priorities are different. Now that you have found something that requires more brain power than even you knew you had. People find, because you step on stage in a bikini rather than get grazed knees and covered in mud doing weird obstacles for 26miles, that it's less 'meaningful' Less of a challenge, less important. People lose themselves training for tough mudder/the marathon. They become focused, they train long hours, they avoid eating things that may impact on their training, results, outcome. Yet they don't put on stripper looking heels and get judged half naked and I understand why therefore its far easier to look down on a bikini competition. I judged it before. I scrutinised over my decision to do one, I questioned why I wanted to, I wondered... "Am I really this person? Do I want to be?"

But truly, to do this, to take part... its one of the most mind, soul and body challenges I have ever dove myself into. To me, I now see it as a sport. I feel like an athlete. I like to do things that challenge me. I haven't always. I'm a lazy person at heart. I wanted it all for minimum effort, until you wake up, late twenties, broke, out of shape, unhappy and you think, the common denominator has to be me. It's not the universe, its me. I wasn't helping myself out. I wasn't doing. I was just waiting. All be it for what I thought was my dream job (acting) and my dream body (anyones but my own) and I was waiting for it to happen to me. And with minimal effort. So I started to dig deep, and find what I loved. In all areas of my life. And asked myself this...

Before I do this, will this raise my level of consciousness, or take away from it?

And it literally made me feel like Ginger Spice again. What a bloody awesome question to ask. For me, this was one of those moments. Will a bikini comp raise my level of consciousness? And of course, It might have all the negative side effects that come with a competition. Comparison, self deprecation, ego... but if I stayed aware, alert and grounded, to the earth, to myself... couldn't I do this and take all the positives from it? Couldn't I do it, pat myself on the back and whether I placed or not, find myself with my consciousness in tact and better yet, raised?

This process so far has made me so much more self aware. So much more in touch with who I am, what issues still remain. I have learnt to want to be strong, not skinny, I have finally stopped needing a thigh gap. I find myself wanting more muscle not less meat on me. I have realised my fear of being successful has always held me back. My fear of winning was far greater than my fear of loosing. I have realised what I am good at, what makes me feel good, I am aware of my demons that creep over me and tell me that I am not good enough, I have accepted that actually, I am, whether I win or loose. There is no validation from 7 judges that can tell me whether I worked hard enough, am in shape enough, when I know I tried, enough. And did enough. Because I felt like I owned it on stage, I felt like I won already.

So did the competition raise my consciousness? Hell to the yizzle. Am I loosing myself in it all. No way, I found more of myself. Am I aware that that was a competition and real life will resume. Of course. Am I prepped and armoured ready for the roller coaster of emotions that are yet to happen, post comp? As ready as I'll ever be.

People may not get it. They, thankfully, do not have to. I have never felt more alive and more happy than I have done in the last five months. Not because I got skinny. But because setting goals and nailing them is liberating. My mum asked me just now, your happy now right? You don't need to do anything but maintain where you are. And I explained that I still want to progress. I still want to make some goals and smash them. I still want to see progress with my body in the same way I want to in my career, my relationships, my mind set. Just because I love my job and I am happy doing what I am doing, that doesn't mean I don't want to own my own studio one day, or that I don't want to write a book or develop a fitness programme that women can use to help them feel good in their skin. anting to progress does not mean that you are unhappy with what you have now. I like my body now, but I am up for the challenge to see what else I can do with it. How else I can develop my body composition, my shape.

So as I go to drink my dragon fruit smoothie by the pool in Bali, and I reflect back to this time last sunday when I was about to go on stage, in my stripper shoes and homemade bikini, all I can say is if you want to do something, if you are thinking about doing it, if you have goals you want to achieve, if you are scared, if your fears want to swallow you up and spit you back out in a mahoosive flem ball...FAAAAK IT... Just go DO IT. 

And if someone questions why... just turn around and say "Because I can..."   

Bikini competition time

So... this is where my fitness journey has led me. To a bikini contest. A freaking bikini contest. I promised Id be honest about all of feelings whilst prepping for this and that is what I shall do.

After a good year/year and a half of teaching myself how to eat properly, love my body, aim for goals not soley on (being skinny) and devising a mind set that let me find a balance... I have decided to throw caution to the wind and possibly throw all that by the waist side and go against all that I ever thought my fitness journey was about and would lead to.

Something in me decided that I needed a challenge. I needed a focus and I wanted to see what my body was capable of. After copious amounts of time watching you tube vids of Nikki Blackketter and Heidi Somers, I felt like a competition was the next step. I've been lifting weights since 2013 at least four times a week (with a mini break in LA) and with  a good time spent doing Kayla Itsines BBG. I love both and think combined they work great. I spend most of my time in a gym working as a personal trainer so it only makes sense to utilise my time and go forth and do a 16 week bikini comp prep.

I am currently in what I am calling 'pre prep' where I am eating a good ol amount of calories (2000) and pretty much not doing cardio. Currently life is bliss.

I flexible eat with calorie/carb cycling by making sure I eat the same amount of protein daily (120g) but my carbs/fats change to vary my days. I go by the 'if it fits my macros' rule but not with anything overly processed. I am having one cheat meal a week and I am not eating dairy or drinking. This is pretty much my daily routine anyways, accept towards the comp I will obviously have to alter this. But I am hoping to flexible eat somewhat through the whole prep... eeeek. The aim is to lower my cals to 1500 by peak week and up my cardio to twice a day.

I feel good about the phases but... I do have worries and concerns.

I am worried I will not get the results I want. I am worried I will not be able to stick to my macros dead on for 16+ weeks. Worried that I will go into a mental whirlwind regarding my body image, that I will not know how to prep properly, do enough research and ultimatley worried that I am not mentally strong enough and knowledgable enough to do this.

But I know that's just typical ego thoughts. Because people have done this before. Eating well is not hard, working out is not hard. Loosing a leg or fighting cancer is hard. So truthfully I am not going to make this a drama and get on and do my research. Train the best way I know how and get my head down and enjoy the journey.

I really want to document it all. So this week I will do my first you tube video looking at my 1st pre prep weeks.

Here is what I have done so far...
*Written a 4 week workout plan (I will change up exercises/order or tempo in another 4 week) (I am going to work through different reps over the 4 weeks for now)
*I have worked out my calories deficit over the 16 weeks. 
*Paid my UKBFF membership fees and printed my entry form. 
*I am researching my butt of of what has worked for other bikini competitiors and worked out what my areas of weakness are. My obliques, my fat percentage and my back. (Oh and my glutes)

 

Here Is what my routine looks like roughly Pre prep weeks 1-3... 

MONDAY: Heavy lifts Deadlifts (and assisting lifts glutes/hammys) & 20 min abs

TUESDAY: PLYO/BBG (legs) & 20 mins handstands & 20 mins LIIS

WEDNESDAY: Heavy lifts Chest (back/shoulders/bics) & 20 min cable glute work

THURSDAY: PLYO/BBG (core) & 20 mins handstands & 20 mins LIIS

FRIDAY: Heavy lift Squats (Quad focused legs) & 20 mins handstands & 20 mins LIIS

SATURDAY: Heavy lift Rows (Back/trics) & 20 mins abs & 20 mins cable Glute work 

SUNDAY: REST DAY

I am now going to get my head down, get enough sleep/water and supplements. I will take glutamine/BCAAs/B complex/vit D and probiotics.

I am in pretty alright shape already. I am healthy, I workout 6 days a week of varying degrees, I treat myself, I don't do any crazy fat burners or what not. I want to do this prep as mindfully and sanely as possible. I will keep a daily diary where I note down my thoughts and feelings and rationalise any negativity that goes on upstairs. 

I will keep you updated with any tantrums/ups/downs/good days and bad. Oh and some before and afters along the way.

After 1 week of Pre prep. 1900cals 125g protein 215g Carbs 60g fat

After 1 week of Pre prep. 1900cals 125g protein 215g Carbs 60g fat